Linda Hirshman Does Not Speak For This Woman

I don’t watch television; I heard about this interview secondhand and had to watch the interview on the web.Good Morning America: The Mommy Wars

I don’t know why I let this annoy me. I really shouldn’t, but it has been eating at me. Perhaps I’m feeling defensive about my own choice to stay home. I’m irritated with Linda Hirshman for perpetuating division between women. Our current lifestyles do enough to interefere with female bonding (for lack of a better word). Hirshman stated to the effect that she isn’t judging, she’s basing her opinion on Western World History. What about the rest of history? What about how women used to come together in support for life’s hardships and joys? Ms. Hirshman, did you happen to see any evidence about how close-knit families used to be? How they helped with childrearing and when someone became ill? We now hire out for those services. It’s great for the economy, but how is it for our souls?

I chose to come home. Lying in a hospital bed for a week certainly put a whole lot of perspective on the value of my child. I could have gone back to work. I could be successful with my former employer, but I’d be working restaurant hours and exposing myself to many temptations that are not suited to raising a stable family.

As far as the happiness level that Hirshman continually referred to, there is more to childhood than a “happiness level.” There are moral and spiritual foundations to be built. I am of the opinion that they aren’t easily instilled on weekends and holidays. Does anyone remember the spike in syphilis the CDC found in Conyers, GA? Just in case a refresher is needed The Lost Children of Rockdale County. These parties were happening in households where both parents were at work. They weren’t happening late at night, these occured during those crucial afterschool hours.

Women who stay home are not ruining the feminist movement. We are not opting out. I firmly believe in equal pay for equal work, just like I would believe it for any person, regardless of their circumstance. However, I do not believe in ‘equal pay’ for unequal work. Women do make sacrifices when they take time out for their families. It is that, a sacrifice, their paychecks or career tracks will suffer, but that is a choice that is made when the decision to have children is chosen. A man who periodically took breaks from the corporate ladder would find the same closed doors. I believe women have worked hard to give us these choices and I appreciate them. I am forever indebted to those who came before me, for having had the ability to attain a formal education and for having had the choice to establish a career. If something were to happen, if my comfortable bubble were to burst, I would have to return to the workforce and I would probably have to retrain, but we have planned for that scenario. I am content with my “mindless routines” and “repetitous job.” I knew it going in.

My shallow side has been fighting with me for this entire entry. These comments have no merit, they just make me feel better. To the lady at the end of the interview who says to the effect that her daughter wants to share a desk and work at your magazine: Lady, listen to what you are saying, it may make you happy to hear, but it breaks my heart, she is saying she MISSES her mom and can’t wait until she can spend all day with you. Ms. Hirshman, you may be well educated, but you are a lousy elocutionist. You sound as though the marbles that fell out of your head are rolling around your mouth. Finally, Ms. Hirshman, I’m no fashion diva or beauty queen, but, bless your heart, get a decent haircut.